What Are Your Actions Telling You?

I've noticed that I have a pattern. I say that I'm committed to something, but then I take actions that actually head me in the opposite direction of what I claim to desire. My eating is a good example. I've been saying that I want to eat better by incorporating more fruits and vegetables into my diet and yet not eating more calories overall. But what I've been doing isn't that at all! I have done a pretty good job of eating more fruits and veggies. The 'problem' if you will is that I'm also eating more calories over all. There's a line from the movie The Kindergarten Cop where Arnold Schwarzenegger's fellow undercover police officer is sick as a dog from eating everything but the kitchen sink. She says something to the effect of, "It couldn't have been the nuts. It couldn't have been the tomato juice. It couldn't have been the potato chips. It couldn't have been the grapes. It couldn't have been the candy bar. It couldn't have been the pizza ... (that made her sick)." That's how I recognize I frequently feel after dinner. Yes, I ate fruits and veggies, but what about all the other junk I threw in on top of my dinner?

The end result is that I end up worrying about my eating going berserk while I do it anyway. As my niece would say, "Is that insane, or what?" Well, I'm always claiming that recognition is the first step and it's true. Now that I've recognized this insane behavior, I can choose to investigate it if I want. What I notice instantly when I investigate this eating pattern is that I feel anxious, ashamed, out of integrity, uncomfortably full and unsettled when I engage in it. I also feel disappointed in myself and my lack of progress toward leading a healthier lifestyle. Then, I get frustrated and I want to give up.

Does any of this sound familiar to you regarding some area of your life? It's not something unique to eating. It could be that you do this type of thing pertaining to your spending, or to your organizing, or to your working. Maybe you say that you want to save a certain amount of money each month, but then you fail to do so. Or perhaps you desire a decluttered home, but each evening and weekend finds you parked in front of the TV or out running around. It could be that you say you have a work goal you'd like to achieve and rather than planning out steps to take to achieve that goal, you spend time socializing with your coworkers.

The point of all of this is that our actions always speak louder than our words. Saying that I want one thing and taking actions that oppose that show me that I'm more committed to something else. To continue the investigation of my eating pattern, I asked myself, "What am I more committed to?" I'm more committed to instant gratification and to eating what I want when I want. (Don't tell me what to do! : ) The issue with this is that that kind of commitment nets me the same results ~ poorer health and uncomfortable feelings. The good news is that I get to choose the decisions that I make. I can choose differently if I'd like to experience different outcomes.

What can I do to help myself make different choices? Is there an action I can take or one I can stop taking that would make it easier for me to remember what I choose to head toward? Might it help if I posted a note in the kitchen that reminded me that health and wellness are a choice? Or would I benefit from not waiting until so late to eat so that I'm not as hungry once dinner rolls around? Maybe I want to journal about what I get out of eating whatever I want whenever I want. The possibilities are endless.

Call to Action: Pick one area in which you say you want one thing but your actions indicate that you're currently more committed to something else. Choose to pay attention to how you feel when you're engaging in one of the behaviors that leads you away from your stated goal. What thoughts go through your head? What are you more committed to than achieving your goal? Would you rather stay comfortable by doing what you've always done than risk changing? Finally, ask yourself what action you can take this week to help yourself make different choices. Do you need to enlist someone to help hold you accountable? Commit to taking whatever action comes up for you.

Remember: The truth is that your actions speak louder than your words. If you think or say that you want one thing but you keep taking actions that lead you away from that, you're really telling yourself what you're more committed to. Are you willing to investigate it? That's the first step toward change. Have fun!